(The Ballad Of) Sharknado


When I found out that SyFy was airing a sequel to Sharknado (appropriately named Sharknado 2: The Second One) I made sure that I kept the night of July 30th free. Nothing was going to keep me from the premiere of Sharknado 2. I was giddy. I screamed the phrase “Let’s go kill some sharks!” no less than five times yesterday. And that steaming pile of shark sh*t did not disappoint. Continue reading


Seven Years Ago, It Ended

 Harry Potter 7

Exactly seven years ago, Sara and I were spending a night at our Uncle Earl and Aunt Jennifer’s. The reason I remember that is because I sat up until midnight in the top bunk of my cousin’s bed. When the clock struck twelve, I knew that thousands and thousands of people—many in costume—were at the city’s Barnes and Noble, madly grabbing for a yellow book that depicted a certain teenage wizard raised a hand to the sky. I was eleven years old. Even at eleven, I knew how significant this night was. At eleven, I was so jealous of those people that I briefly considered breaking out of the house to go to the bookstore.

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Maryland, My Maryland

I’m writing this from Port St. Lucie, Florida. For those of you who are unfamiliar with Florida’s geography, as I am, Port St. Lucie is less than an hour from West Palm Beach and about two hours from Orlando. A short car trip could get you to a half-dozen famous beaches, the best seafood on the east coast, or to Harry Potter World. It’s eighty degrees right now. I went swimming twice yesterday.

But I miss the heck out of Maryland.

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God Bless ‘Murica and This Soccer Thing


I hate soccer about 98% of the time. Of the remaining 2% of my life, I spend half of it enjoying soccer, playing pickup games or watching people get nailed by a ball to the face. The other half of the time, I love soccer like I love no other sport. I pretend to understand it, I suddenly want to play it, and I take no shame in sitting down for hours at a time rooting for players I’ve never heard of before as if I’m an active fan. I’m talking, obviously, about the world cup.

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